Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
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