Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
Randomize
