babies were throwing up all over the place
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Randomize
