super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
Randomize