I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
Heybabeimwearingurpanties
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
Randomize
