that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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