is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize