On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
Randomize
