I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize
