you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Randomize
