I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
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