He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
Randomize
