she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
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