Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
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