i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Randomize
