when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
Brb crying the tears of my youth
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
