When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
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