I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
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