So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize
