I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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