yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
Randomize
