Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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