Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Soap is not a condiment
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
