The maid of honor just puked.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
Randomize
