I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
