Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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