don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Randomize
