Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
Randomize
