Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
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