Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
Randomize
