I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
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