Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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