Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
