Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
Randomize