Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
You just projectile vomited on my dad across the table at waffle house.
Do you think he can smell the vodka?
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
Randomize
