sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
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