i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
Randomize
