Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
Who died my cat blue again?
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Randomize
