She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
