so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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