Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
Randomize
