home. puking in laundry basket.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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