does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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