he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
