I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
You're gonna be sprawled out basking in the sun working on your tan like a ridiculously hot iguana, and I'm gonna be here bundled up in about 72 layers just so I don't freeze my dick off looking like the Michelin man's gay cousin
i apologize, I may have called you an iguana
Mistakes were made
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Randomize