lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
my "about me" section on Facebook should read "hell-bound alcoholic who wants to fuck a 40-year-old crackhead"
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
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