I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
