Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
Randomize
