The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
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