Christians are straight up FREAKS
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
Randomize
